SURPRISE!!

exactly a year ago, i celebrated my birthday in irvine, ca. it was an amazing surprise bday potty that almost made me pee in my pants. if history has a way of repeating itself, it sure did for me again this year. in the most unsuspecting way, i was invited to a party, that turned out to be mine. upon reflection, i realized that two years ago, i had the biggest surprise party in ilula, kenya - at a orphantage where the children paraded into the hut to sing me a song. while each surprise was very special in its own way, all of them had one thing in common; LOVE. i felt the love of Christ through the kids, my family and friends. if God made us "fearfully and wonderfully," He sure wanted you to know it.

so here i am, exactly one year after having left all of my family and friends into the great unknown, i felt just as loved and celebrated. God is infinitely faithful and full of wonderful surprises. those "God surprise moments" are His way of saying... "p.s., i love you"

going native...

it finally happened, i started attaching "la" to my words and phrases. i vowed to never let this happen but after one year of drinking the local water, it finally happened, ok-la? that's not all, i find myself wearing sweaters in singapore! i used to stare at people in utter "shock and awe" whenever i saw one wearing anything that resembled a sweater. in a country that is constantly hot and humid, it seemed like insanity to wear anything more than a bikini top, but here i was... in a hoodie. local foods and drinks are a given but durian?!? i use to run for the hills if i even smelled a durian from a mile away but recently, i enjoyed a durian pastry. i also found myself a local hair dresser and a dentist. so now with a crumpler bag slung around my shoulders, wearing flip flops, skinny jeans and bangs that sometimes drape over my eyes, pushing my way into a packed MRT, you'd never know that i was a valley girl from north hollywood...

oh the difference a year makes...

my old camp counselor from high school once said, "time flies like the wind and fruit flies like bananas." to this day i have no idea what that means but the reality is that time does fly, more than fly. with each passing year, it travels in warp speed. i feel like blog has become my father confession. "forgive me father for it's been 3 months since i blogged." on the one hand, it means i'm actually living instead of writing about living so that's good. on the other hand, it is nice to keep a consistent journal of some sorts, blasting my thoughts into the cosmos and letting it fall where it may.

i am closely approaching the end of my first year in spore. WHAT??? yes, you heard me, one... whole... year...! so much has happened yet so little dates! seriously, so much so that spore has become my home. when i travel for work now, i can honestly say, "yea, going HOME soon" rather than "going back to singapore." so what made all the difference? community of believers that's become my friends and my family away from home. people to share my joys and disappointments, dreams and fears. people to call up last minute for a movie and a pint and people i can rally just to hang and play guitar hero. people i can pray with and celebrate the life of Christ with. people i call friends...

there are still moments when i miss my other home... going to my aunt's for yummy korean food, spoiling my niece and teaching her to bike, degreasing my own bike for another good run up the santa monica mountains, fondu gatherings and marathon karaoking, smelling mom's freshly baked muffins from the oven even when she knows i'm fasting! going to trader joe's, hollywood bowl and senior fish. and friends from christian assemly... mission buds and skidrow ministry. i am learning to let go to gain, one experience for another, one life for another. "the old has gone, the new has come." guess that's why they call it a journey and not a spin cycle.

stay tuned... working on my top 10 most memorable moments in s'pore!

first hike and bike...

in spore... where the heat and the humidity occasionally provide SOME relief! yes, went hiking AND biking all in one day... and what's better is with friends, new found friends in spore. life is just better that way, with friends that is. moments of happiness and misery, all seem better with friends. even if i were to sit around doing nothing, it is still better with friends, as it would no longer be nothing. this was a good "friend" weekend, unlike my sometimes loner ones. i ate, played the guitar, had coffee, laughed, ate some more, drank, worshipped, and yes, hike'n biked with friends. while leaving friends behind in LA was hard and painful, it gave me opportunities to make new ones, my new homies that will make spore feel like home. merriam-webster defines friend as "one attached to another by affection or esteem ." simply put, it's a sense of belonging... that you belong somewhere, to someone. i belong in spore after all...

Day 3 in Milan

i've grown quite fond of parco sempione. it's become my daily route, not only to start the day, but end it. i've also become familiar with the regular homeless there. one of them looks like a shorter version of hagrid, but not as magical. what i love about parks, like this one (which sort of reminds me of central park - my favorite place in manhattan) is that it doesn't discriminate, it is open to all, rain or snow to kings and beggars alike and in my case, locals and foreigners alike. the bench doesn't have more cushion for some nor does the path smooth out for others. the tree doesn't shade only the "lovely," or the grass grow only for the youth. it doesn't ignore you because you don't speak their language. it just exists for you regardless. so i love it. it's become my favorite part of milan, not the arts, the fashion, or even the food (that includes coffee!).

so today, like all the other days in milan, i started the day through the park and ended it through the park, but in between left the city of milan to venture a different scene. lake como was my escape from all the second hand smoking and expensive goods. just north of the city, it was the perfect get away. the panoramic view from the boat ride up the lake was simply gorgeous. the villas were strewn throughout, parts of it almost story book like and very picturesque. we even got good glimpse of the snow capped alpse. we reached a small, quaint little town called bellagio, yes, the real thing, no casinos or musical fountains. here i had two slices of margherita pizzas, pastry, and a cute, silver purse to go ; )

the day eventually had to end and we came back to milan where once again i had dinner... and yes, ALL BY MYSELF! getting quite use to it, but doesn't mean i like it! had risotto and a glass of chianti, then back through the parco sempione to end my day...

tomorrow i head out to geneva, and trust me, it didn't come one gelati too soon!

Day 2 in Milan

Milan Duomo is this amaizing architecture of a cathedral. Don't know much about it but it stands majestic, demanding homage from locals and visitors alike. Inside is just as amazing and beautiful. The phenominal arches and buttresses, deeply, colorful stainglass windows, endless marble halls... yet even with all of its majesty and splendor, it seemed cold, dark and empty. There was no spirit nor life in this house of worship where saints once gave passionate exhoration of God's divine truths. The pews were empty except for the tourists resting their feet and others, snapping pictures of the marble statues and stainglass windows. How sad... to think that all that is left of this amazing place is the rotating door of tourists checking off a site from their Milan list. But I pray... that this place be filled once again with truth worshippers and seekers of God and find love and grace through the cross.

The rest of the day flew while shopping and slow mo'd when my feet hurt. There were just too many smokers everywhere. I've had more second hand smoking in the two days I've been here than my entire life. How is it possible for the entire city of Milan to be smoking? But in fairness, that's not all they do... they bike and walk their dogs. And all the shops allow you to bring your doggy. And while I mentioned shopping, I say that modestly. It's too darn expensive to shop here! How do Italian women afford it??? Nuts... crazy... kookoo.

That said, it was a good 2nd day. Navigating my way around the city quite well, all on foot as the taxis are way too expensive. There are other modes of transport but too lazy to figure it out. Luckily tomorrow, I get a little get away from the city and get a tour of the nearby suburbs and Lake Como. GET ME OUTTA HERE BEFORE I GO BROKE!

Milan in May

my first solo mini break overseas... nervous and excited, i ventured to milan. technically i wouldn't consider this a full fledge vacation as it was just a long weekend that i leveraged on a biz trip. regardless, here i am, alone and... well alone. all in all, i survived my first day pretty well. here are my initial observations...

• everything is expensive
• everyone smokes
• men are goooood looking!
• lots of pda's
• people love to just hang out and chill out
• fake pradas and guccis are also sold in the land of originals!
• architecture is beautiful
• people are very fashionable
• the weather is PERFECT in May!

let me just say again how excellent the weather was... cool and dry! coming from s'pore, it was pure heaven. it was a perfect day for... well, just chillin outdoors and so i did, along with the rest of the milaneans on this labor day.

maybe it's because of all people hanging out (or the pda's) but it felt very lonely from time to time. families, couples, friends, eating, laughing and hanging out... and here is me. in my mind, i am singing... "all by myself! don't wanna be, all by myself... ANYMORE!" hehe... it wasn't that bad, even eating alone didn't feel as awkward. but it sure would have been nice to have a buddy with me, or even a dog! got two more days in milan before i head over to geneva for work. we'll see how this mini break unfolds...

all birds poop the same way

so in my attempt to "get out more" and explore singapore, i went to the famous bird park with a couple of church buddies. it was cool, except for the weather.

guess i should start by stating that i am not a bird fan. they are noisy and messy. growing up in so cal, i am mostly familiar with crows and pigeons, both of which i can totally live without! the tropical birds are very different and lends more to the eye, and i might add, to the ears and the scents (stinky in masses). that said, what struck me wasn't their majesty, diversity, and coat of many colors, but the fact that they all poop the same! i felt privileged to witness three very different bird types poop (that alone paid for the admissions charge!). they all had that milky white, watery look, and the projectory of those suckers coming out! the speed and force seemed almost WMD like! the first was a ginormous austrich (sp?), the second an african crane, the third, our awesome bald eagle. what's even more amazing is when they do it soaring through the air! that's talent! i can't even do #1 when i'm distracted sometimes, let alone in motion! (sorry, TMI). just impressive is all. it's like, "i'm walking, and doing my thang and oh, there it is!" - totally effortless!

one of the church buddies asked if i'd rather be a bird or a fish. tough one, it's right up there with "who invented liquid soap and why?" no doubt it's beautiful "under the sea," but there is something about making the sky your dwelling place that seems liberating and heavenly. i also like the idea of always coming up for "big picture." so i guess that would be my answer. ironic considering i don't care much for birds, but love fish (mainly as lunch or dinner).

what's next on my s'pore list? speaking of fish... food... chili crabs sound good! ; )

don't let time be your missed opportunity

i heard it said that there are two ways to measure time, chronos and opportunity. chronos is greek for time. opportunity on the other hand is not as precise and as easy to measure. it's perspective really. everyone wants to maximize their time and become an effective time manager. seminars and books have been written about time management, yet the reality is that everyone is given the same, finite time in a day. so what is there to manage? what would make more sense to "manage" would be tasks as there is really nothing you CAN do about time. what you choose to do, one over the other... that is what you manage. when you choose to spend your time doing something, it's at the cost of not doing something else (or at least at that time). this "task" is what i call opportunity. if i really want to live my life to the fullest, it's not by managing my time better, but about making the most of every opportunity. someone said of mother teresa (one of my personal hero), that "everything she did was an opportunity to love." her time was measured by how well she loved.

in light of this perspective, i can't help but regret over my most recent missed opportunities (to love). in mumbai, while sitting in traffic, a little boy appeared out of no where tapping on my window, asking for money for food. it was a split second decision, but rather than quickly rolling down the window and pulling some money out, i managed to justify that this will just draw more people into traffic. the other very vivid missed opportunity was just last week, on my way to work. it was raining and i had my umbrella with me. i saw an old woman about to walk past me. what i noticed was her battered umbrella. the metal rims were broken and it barely covered her. she was wet and getting wetter. she walked past me and the moment was gone. it was another split second decision. my instint was to give her my umbrella and yet my rational was that i would be wet going into work. surely, she didn't have to face the same crowd... right? and yet those two faces are still a picture book in my mind of very real, missed opportunities. i think about people that don't rationalize their behavior but simply love, boldly and radically, at any cost to them. those are my heros, ones that don't measure or count the cost.

opportunities to love, to be generous and compassionate are everywhere if i would only but look up once in awhile from my own self centeredness; unlike time, it's endless and "favors... those who are prepared (to love)." "...and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing..." (1 Corinthians 13:2).

4 months?!?

holy cow! what a slackard! it's been 4 months already since my last blog and soooooo much has happened! since november 25th, 2007, i went home to LA for the holidays, went snow boarding in mammoth, got sick, came back, went to hong kong, tokyo, and MUMBAI! my first trip to india and it was amazing! hope to go back soon. it's definitely a place where anything and everything goes. as a developing city, you see the old and the new colliding in the most interesting and sometimes inconvenient way, but all heading towards a dynamic progress. it has a tremendous energy, something is always going on, constant movement on the streets and you become a part of it. the food was fantastic! i'm in love with the northern indian cuisine, and yes, some very good looking bloaks out there!

S'pore on the contrary is a peaceful exchange to mumbai - quiet and highly developed, boring in comparison but you can let out a big sigh. i'm discovering more and more idiosyncracies about this place, for example, people have an amazing ability to walk in slow motion but still cut you off in an instant. and what's up with decaf??? it's more difficult to get a cup of decaf here, and not only here but in tokyo. walk into any starbucks in tokyo and ask for a tall decaf and inevitably the barrista politely request that you wait 10 minutes extra. considering i make "coffee nervous," i never take the leisure offer.

i am trying to play tennis when i can, IF i can find someone to play with. also thinking about taking up wakeboarding (that should be interesting). found an awesome church with great people in Spore called every nation church singapore, and someone in the church that offered to teach me to play the guitar! yes, alot has happened in the 4 months that i have been blog-less.

today is easter, i am reminded of the GREAT EXCHANGE, one where we exchanged a King for a criminal, His life for mine, when heaven opened up and invited us in.